What Should Have Been
by samziful
Summary: A collection of One Shots (pre 10x13) based on scenes in Greys between Jackson & April, that didnt end like I wanted them to. (Probably won't be in season/episode order)


At first he was intrigued, he wondered what the commotion was outside and that's when he saw it. The paramedic down on one knee, proposing to April.  
*His* April.

He watched as the scene evolved in front of him. She looked so happy, and of course she has said yes to him, why wouldn't she? The paramedic was perfect for her, he shared her same beliefs and wanted the same things as her. Marriage, babies, the whole damn thing. He wanted that too but now it was too late. She was going to marry Matthew and that would be it. His April, gone forever. Jackson watched as Matthew picked April up and spun her around. He couldn't help but smile when she looked at him, eyes seeming as if she was asking ''Is this ok?'' What else could he do other than smile? Shake his head, shout out ''NO!'' He wanted April to be happy, so so happy. So he smiled, hoping his eyes weren't giving away the truth. He had to say something to her, to tell her not to marry Matthew and that *he* was the man for her. He couldn't lose her.

Eventually the crowd disbursed and he watched as April kissed Matthew on the cheek and came walking over to him smiling. He could feel his palms sweating as she came up to him, he had to say something to her.

''So I bet that was a shock?'' he asked her.  
''Um yeah, it was.'' she said giving Jackson a smile.  
''Don't do it.'' as he moved closer to April he held her hands. ''Dont marry him. He's not the man for you.''  
''He's not? Then who is?'' she asked not really wanting to know the answer. She was happy now. She had moved on. At least that's what she had told herself all these months.  
''Me. I'm the man for you. I know things got messed up and I have no right to say this to you now when you are so happy. But please, don't marry Matthew.''

April was shocked, why was he saying all this now? He'd had plenty of other times to say it.

''I want you, April.'' He said as he moved even closer to her, putting his hand to her cheek and stroking it with his thumb.  
''I..I don't know what to say Jackson. Everything got so messed up and I..Matthew, he's perfect for me, you know this. But..'' as she looked at his eyes all full of love ''There will always be a part of me that will always love you. But you don't really want me. You just want me now because I am in something that is real, Matthew loves me and can give me what I need.''  
As Jackson pulled her body closer, she couldn't help but feel the familiar feelings she had tried so badly to keep locked away.

''I want you because you are the best thing that ever happened to me April. We belong together.''  
''You smell good.'' She said, resting her head against his chest. After a few seconds she looked into his eyes she couldn't help but smile. Those eyes, the ones she had drown in many times previous.  
''April, I love you. I'm sorry everything got so messed up but I want you and I need you. Things will be better this time, we can do things right.'' He tilted her chin up and kissed her gently on the lips.  
''Mmm,'' she whispered as Jackson pulled away to look at April. But she wasn't ready to stop kissing him. She pushed herself against him, lifting her head up, she pulled his head down and kissed him hard, liked she hadn't done for so long. It seemed like hours passed, but in reality it was only a few minutes. Tongues clashing and hands roaming, she eventually got the strength to stop.

''Do you really mean it?'' April asked him eyes full of hope.  
''Yes April, I do. I should never have let you go in the first place. Be mine, be with me forever.'' He said to her smiling and gently moved a strand of hair behind her ear.  
''I have to go and tell Matthew I can't marry him. That I'm in love with someone else.'' She stood on her tiptoes and kissed Jackson gently on the lips. ''I will see you later'' she told him. ''I love you.''  
''I love you too April.''

He smiled as she walked away, so happy that she had given them another chance. This time they wouldn't mess it up. Life would be perfect. He had to go and talk to Stephanie though and to tell her it was over between them, and that, he was not looking forward to at all.


End file.
